{running in place}

Am I the only Mommy out there who feels like I’m running in place? You know those people you see running who don’t really look like they are running? They have that strange tortoise run that is going somewhere but doesn’t really look like it. I mean eventually they must get there. Right?

In my heart I want to run the race of Motherhood like a hare but I’m really running it like a tortoise. I know I’m not the best mommy out there and I know I’m not the worst. It’s like I’m making strides but then I find myself getting caught up in the same struggles again and again. Suddenly I’m yelling at my kids after vowing to myself and sweet Jesus that lasts night’s rant was the last time I would ever yell at my kids again. I feel terrible! I know that may be dramatic and unrealistic but I often wonder: am I really getting anywhere at this pace? I know in my gut that I am a better mommy today than I was 7 years ago when Paigey came on to the scene. I know I work harder at it each passing year and that feelings are typically not that reliable.

The reality is that I’m just not progressing as fast as I would like. I am praying and reading all the books and hanging out with other great Mommies to try to do better. I’m devoting most of my waking hours to my kids. And I love them fiercely even if I do mess up and make mistakes.

If I keep working at it I’m certain that I will eventually finish the race of motherhood better than I started.

After all, as the old story goes, SLOW AND STEADY WINS THE RACE. Right?

Good thing tortoise-shell is in these days! wink, wink!

musings-250

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